Honestly now

4 Jun 2010, 11:38 2 Comments View Comments | Add Comment

In the derivative bubble of property marketing a persistent challenge exists, whereby getting your point across in an engaging way isn't always that simple. You only need to trawl through my, and many of my contemporaries, back catalogue of property marketing communications to bask in a Francis Rossi like chord progression of formulaic and hackneyed language. It's often well received and generally always accepted, but it's an inevitable symptom of industry conditioning and institutionalisation; something for which we need a tonic.

In particular, there are some perennial idioms that don't seem to want to go away:

Some buildings are 'landmarks' (The Guggenheim, Big Ben, The Gherkin, The Civil Justice Centre), 99.9% of the remainder are not.

Certain addresses are 'prestigious' (David Cameron's new gaff, 1 Central Park, Avenue Montainge). For the most part, they help the postman find you.

First dates, skipping school and roller skates are 'exciting', I'm yet to experience the same frisson stood in an office.

Depending on how the CBD's delineated, surely there can only be one building in each city that sits at its metaphoric 'heart'. If we can't decide, perhaps we could divvy up into commercial ventricles?

I'm still not sure exactly what 'high specification' means...

So what's the solution? If we do decide to banish this genus of phrases from our vernacular, apart from when they're actually true, perhaps honesty is the best policy. I'm still waiting for a client to ask me to pull together a candid advert for a product that's cheap, not really near a train station, with a mediocre ambience, all delivered with the kind of service you'd expect in a greasy spoon.

I'm not sure the pinstripes are ready for such a frank approach, but the next time someone like me shows you an advert for your absolutely average property development claiming it to be the most exciting, high specification, landmark and prestigious building on the block, tell them to start being a little more honest. With any luck, you might even get something back that actually stands out from the crowd.

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What?!!?! …

comment by PIN STRIPE | 04/06/2010 17:13:20

Come on now , Matt, you are letting the marketing guru side down. Most property people would be happy with honesty, but they pay for hyperbole, from the likes of you. Don't kill the golden goose.…

comment by Charles Saatchi | 07/06/2010 14:03:16